Bob: You've reached a certain amount of success. If that
were suddenly, like, taken away-- wiped out-- where would you be today?
Peter: I'd go back to the Village and be a folk singer.
Bob: How 'bout you, Davy?
Davy: I'd go back to the Village and watch him be a folk
singer.
Bob: Mike?
Mike: I'd probably go burn the village. (laughter)
Micky: I'd probably be dating my science teacher.
Bob: Hey, Peter, is there something that you'd really want,
uh, that you'd really flip out over?
Peter: Yes.
Bob: What?
Peter: Texas.
Bob: Davy?
Davy (laughing): Ursula Andress.
Bob: Who?
Davy: Ursula Andress. No, a jet. Y'know those little
jets?
Bob: Yeah.
Davy: 'Cause Mike can fly it.
Mike: Well, ah, I wouldn't really buy anything like that,
y'know. I mean, there's no-- the things that money can buy, I can almost buy, I suppose-- Uh, thanks, Dave. The only thing that you can, uh... We've all got what we want, man.
Bob: Mick?
Micky: What?
Bob: Yeah, what, babe?
Micky: What would I buy?
Bob: Yeah.
Micky: Well, I kinda look at it-- I--
Peter: If-if-if you could buy something that money couldn't buy, what would you buy?
Micky: Yeah.
Mike: Which is weird.
Micky: If I, if I could-- if I was gonna buy something, I
kinda look at it the opposite way around. I figure when, when you have enough money, then, then you don't need all the, all the material stuff around ya. I'd like to, I'd like to buy--
Mike: Sure you do.
Micky: --big city blocks of buildings and plant orange groves.
Mike: Hey, I gotta tell you of a very freaky idea--
Bob: What?
Mike: --that, a local, uh, guys-- uh, a local gang-- gang of guys is propogating now.
Bob: What's that?
Mike: And that is digging things that are ugly. Y'know? The Hearts and Flowers do that, you see-- that's a
group-- and, uh, they say that in order to dig things, uh, that are pretty takes no special talent. What it really takes a talent to do is dig something ugly.
Bob: Like what?
Mike: Well, I don't know. You dig something like a garage
door, y'know. I mean, how many people say "OH! Look at that garage door," y'know? I mean, you get a lot of this stuff: "Oh, what beautiful azaleas." That doesn't--
Bob: Does that apply to, uh, people, too?
Mike: Well, it applies to you a lot, Bob.
Bob (laughing): Thanks, baby.
Davy: I think I--
Mike: I think we oughta go on a National Monkees Love Something Ugly This Week.
Davy: Yeah. Man you better watch out for these guys.
Mike: You are not. I'm uglier than you.
Davy: You are not. I'm the ugliest.
Mike: I'm the ugliest! It's me, it's me, it's me!
Micky: All right! I lose!
(Peter sneezes)
Davy: Wait, Keever-- come here a minute. C'mere. C'mere.
Wait, man. Wait, man.
Peter: (to Keever, blocking his shot) Will you get out of my key, please?
Davy: Just fixin' your face up, man.
Keever (laughing): Okay, alright.
Davy: There you go. Okay. Go on, man. You're okay now. Where's your glasses, man? Oh--
Keever: Okay, alright.
Davy: --wait, wait. Okay. (turns to camera) I'd like you all to know that this is Keever. Now Keever's our make-up man, man. He's the greatest guy in the world. Well--
Bob: Does he make-- What does he do for you?
Peter: He makes up.
Davy: He makes up, man.
Bob: Hey, Keever--
Peter: If we have a fight, he makes up.
Davy: If we have a fight--
Bob: Wait a minute. Wait, let me ask you something--
Keever: Uh, yes?
Bob: --really, while the boys are there. Is it difficult
working with these guys?
Keever: No, I, I, I like 'em very much, so uh it's not difficult. I'm a father.
Davy: (grabs Keever's shirt) Say something better than that, Keever! (Davy hugs him.)
Bob: Mike, this afternoon we had lunch--
Peter: (off camera) Hi, Bob.
Bob: --and you said the one thing you really wanted was a house. And I want to know why that's so important to you to have your own house. (laughter) No, I mean I don't know why.
Mike: Why do I want a house?
Bob: Yeah. Why?
Mike: Why do you like that shirt, Bob? "...Why do you want a house?" To keep the wind off of me. (laughter, Mike looks around in disbelief) It's unbel-iev-able! (laughs) ...Why do I want a house? (sighs in amusement) Well, when it rains, you get wet if you live in a parking lot.